band problems

[dirtty420boy]

didnt know if this was the right place to post this but....

so i've been jamming with friends and its been fun but now they all want to get serious about starting a band. actually 2 dif bands. only prob is they both have the same issue.

one band only wants to play and sound like metallica
the other just wants to do some kind of korn/ limp bizkit hard rap metal thing.

im not against playing any of those kinds of music. but my thing is i want to just get together and just play what ever comes out. so how do i get the band to compramise more????? anyone go thru this. cause everyone is being thick headed and not willing to compramise. they want to do there own thing.

 

[Emzyo]

I have abit same situation we have a band but other want to play only thrash metal, and saying im close minded cause I listen to death metal most and if I suggest something they just say ♣♣♣♣ song lets play master of puppets, durrr

 

[IngerAlb]

You can't force ppl to stay together and enjoy the "experience" if what they really want to do is go separate ways. Get together and explain to them how you feel about it; but if they don't change their mind, there's nothing you can do about it. It takes a lot of wasted time on stupid stuff like this to learn the art of compromising and keeping a band tight. On the other hand, you have to accept that these things do happen and that life goes on

@Recto: I don't want to sound mean, but your bandmates might have a point. You see, when you want something and the rest of the band another, you need to realise you can't demand that 3 - 4 - 5 guys would comform to your way of seeing things. It's better to just aknowledge you're not on the same page and that maybe this is not the band for you. It hurts when it happens and it feels like you've wasted your time, but trust me, it's for the best, because now you learn what you really want to do and what things you would like to avoid in the future. Most bands work like this: either mutual understanding between members, respect and similar musical tastes and goals, or someone calls the shots and the rest comform (I really hate this type). No matter how you manage it, a band needs to have a certain direction and goal; it's counterproductive to argue all the time about every little thing that needs to be done.

 

[JSmith]

Dirtty, if they are not willing to compromise, maybe it's time to walk away. Forcing anyone to do anything in a band situation usually never works out.

I'm in a situation right now where I might be the one walking away. I don't want to but my gut is telling me it's for the best in the long run. Started out as the latest member of the band. I replaced the previous bass player because he basically has really bad stage fright. So for two years I played the originals that were written and of course any new material I had my input but it was still their band. Fast forward to when singer/guitarist A leaves to go down state to work. Singer/guitarist B, the drummer, and I start a side project. What a blast, everyone is on the same page, we're enjoying writing, good creative material is coming out. About 8 months into this singer/guitarist B announces he's moving. We're bummed but decide to do some decent recordings of our material. Around this time band member A tells us he's coming back up to go to school and wants to continue playing but taking it a slight different direction than before since it would obviously have a different dynamic. So, we have a first jam session as a 3-piece. Felt a bit forced but material with some promise was created. Three practices later, we're no farther and new material has to be coerced out of band member A. He's simply to close minded and musically immature compared with band member B. He's a nice guy and means well but it's just not working. It's bad when he spends 5 minutes trying to get this one riff to work after I've stopped playing. Then the drummer looks at me, stops playing, rolls his eyes, and then announces practice is over. That was a clear sign to me right there, that this probably isn't going to work out and to maybe just let it be. Speaking with the drummer, his feelings are the same as mine. So at this point, I have to decide how to tell a friend that I'm not going to play in the band anymore. Long story short, it's never easy and is unique to your situation. Do what your gut tells you to.

 

[BassAccusation]

I've had to go through this same thing multiple times, I've learned to just take things slow and don't let things get in the way of a great project working out. Our guitarist and I are considering bringing our old drummer back in our project after we split in the summer because things were being rushed. It's hard to make those type of phone calls because some people do take it as a personal attack and friendships can be ended over it too sadly. I've learned to look at the process as a collaborative business between every member, and I've learned to not take it personally. If you're spending a lot of time and things aren't working out the way you are wanting, I'd say talk to everyone about where they stand on the project.